Secret lives, secret thoughts, and even secret bank accounts get found out eventually. Eccl. 12:14 For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil. The weight of carrying a secret can make one sick with the dread of others finding out. The unwanted responsibility the secret contains that is affecting other people will also affect you. The secret may end up controlling your life because of the tremendous weight you find yourself under. Valerie Bertinelli said, “You’re only as sick as your secrets.”
I grew up with a weighty secret throughout my childhood. I had seen my father beat my mother until there was blood smeared all over. The smothered sounds of punches connecting with my mother’s body and face were memories deep within me. I was five years old when we had escaped this violent and volatile life environment. However, the memories of those ugly and cowardice events my father had brutalized us with remained a secret of great weight within my soul. Prov. 29:22 An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot-tempered man abounds in transgression.
It was in the fall of 1996 that I decided to expose this heavy secret by writing the story of my young life and relationship with my father. I wrote a story called, I’m Telling On You Doug. Only after I wrote it out in full living color, exposing all that was brutally done to us, did the weight finally come off my tattered life.
The key to my victory ended up being that I gave complete forgiveness from my heart toward my father and all that he had done so that God could heal me completely. Mark 11:25 And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven will also forgive you your wrongdoing. I was miraculously healed and delivered from all the nightmarish memories. There was truly real healing that took place within my heart and life.
I have since learned to shed weighty secrets that can cause hurt. When I feel the enormity of a secret too great to carry – I drop it! Maybe you have been carrying secrets that have weighed your life down as if you were dragging or stumbling under an overloaded packsack. It is time to drop it and let the secrets out of the bag so you can have your life back and get on a God-led track that leads to peace, joy, and love. Neh. 8:10b And do not be grieved, for the joy of the LORD is your strength. Hand over your secret hurts to the Lord so He can show you how to overcome the garbage these pustulent secrets have caused in your life.
Not all secrets are bad. The intimate ones between my wife and I that make us smile and draw us closer to each other and God are healthy. But the ones that tear families apart are to be dropped or exposed as the poisonous plagues they are. Plus, a secret should never be told that is generated out of gossip and slander. Prov. 20:19 He who goes about as a slanderer reveals secrets, therefore do not associate with a gossip.
Secrets that have scarred and maimed people’s very souls are to be confessed, disclosed, and communicated. After this is done, forgiveness is to be given by grace to the ones who caused the pain, so that God’s healing freedom can rush in like a mighty wind and blow all hurts away. Psalm 91:1 He that dwells in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
How much weight are you carrying within yourself because of secrets kept and protected by ignorance, fear, and confusion? You can be set free by giving them up and forgiving the past. This courageous act from your heart will help you take back your present and future. With the Lord’s help, may it be so in your life. Amen.